NOW, WILL YOU HEAR ME?

As I hold the phone, my hands shake.
Why am I dialing? I need you.
As you pick up, my voice breaks.
You have to hear what I’ve been through.
I know it’s a second to midnight;
But I need a friend to listen.
I’m so messed up, I’m shaking with fright.
I have no haven to hide in.
Your voice is groggy, but please don’t grumble;
I can almost see you roll your eyes.
You’re dozing now: you’re starting to fumble;
You’re startled awake again by my cries.
It’s the same old, same old problems again:
My bills are mounting; my children are sick;
My roof is broken; it leaks with the rain.
I need encouragement, and I need it quick.
You manage to stay awake long enough to say:
“Girl, pull yourself together and get some sleep;
By morning, all your problems will go away.
Goodnight, love, remember it’s no use to weep”
I can hear the dial tone now but I can’t believe it;
I had some problems; and you didn’t hear me out.
My tears are louder, and my heart is bursting with it.
I wonder what life is all about.
I walk in a daze toward the bathroom door,
My sorry, sorry life playing in my head.
My last vision before I pass out is the bathroom floor.
My whole body no longer feels like lead.
Tomorrow, they’ll find the note on the bathroom shelf;
And I hope someday your pain wanes;
But maybe, if you had listened, you could forgive yourself:
I wouldn’t have slit my veins.